Deepology

Only4Mal’s Bathroom Etiquette for Men’s Public Restrooms

Have you ever been in a public bathroom at a urinal and somebody comes in the bathroom, uses the urinal next to you, and then wants to hold a conversation?  What’s wrong with that you ask?  Let me tell you.  First of all don’t use the stall directly next to another man…that’s just not cool.  At all times, whenever possible, give at least a one empty urinals distance between you and the man at the next urinal, and if that’s not possible, then go use the “sit-down” commodes.  Only use the urinal directly next to another man when there’s absolutely no other choice. 

Second, it’s ok to speak (like: what’s up) but if I have “mini-me” in my hand and you have “mini-you ”  in yours, chances are I’m not really trying to hold a conversation at that point, catch me at the sink when I’m washing my hands if you want to chat.  Don’t come in talking about the Wizard’s or Redskin’s game last night, cause at the moment I'm busy and don't want to hear it!  In fact, for real-for real, I probally wouldn't want to hear it if I weren’t using the stall anyway. 

Which brings me to my next point; there is a standard “Drop-and-Flush” rule in effect at all times which states: for each “kid” that you drop in the “pool”, flush-em!  This keeps the amount of odor you subject on another unsuspecting person in the bathroom down.  And the same rule for the urinal applies to the commodes as well…don’t sit in the one drectly next to me…keep at least one empty commode between us, unless you don't have a choice.  In that case, you gotta do what you gotta do!

Those are the basic rules of etiquette for the men’s bathroom.  These rules protect everyone from possible misunderstandings, and unpleasant scenarios.

PS.  here is a helpfull tip I'll throw in as a bonus: never wipe more than three times with that hard cheep toilet paper you find in public stalls, because by the third wipe, you are ripping off skin, three is the max that sensitive area can bare, taking a fourth wipe is just plain suicide! And the grand-daddy bathroom rule of them all….Wash Your Hands!

April 30, 2008